If I would only stray a bit

8. You should keep the oneness of the Body at any cost and escape from division in the fear. of Christ and of the judgment at His judgment seat. Do not forget that one day we will all stand before Christ at His judgment seat (Rom. 14:10; 2 Cor. 5:10). Brother Nee wrote a hymn that is quoted in Watchman Nee-a Seer of the Divine Revelation in the Present Age. Stanza 5 says,

Unto the judgment seat of Christ
I daily look away;
May all my living and my work
Abide the fire that day.

It is not adequate only to love the Lord; we must also fear Him. One day we will see Him face to face. How will you give your account to Him? Quite often when people came to argue and fight with me, I considered inwardly, "Man, if you speak in this way, do you believe that in that day you will pass the judgment seat of Christ?" This is why people did not see Brother Nee and me fighting with anyone. Only the Lord is the One who judges. The first thing you should remember is God's eternal economy, and the last thing you should remember is Christ's judgment seat. In between are many good items.

LIVING A CRUCIFIED LIFE

To live by Christ as life, one must see the subjective aspects of Christ's death. Watchman Nee received the revelation that he had been crucified with Christ, that it was no longer he that lived, but Christ that lived in him. He also saw that to experience the death of Christ in a subjective way, he needed to bear the cross. He was crucified with Christ, but he had to remain in Christ's crucifixion. To remain in Christ's crucifixion is to bear the cross, not letting the old man or the flesh leave the cross. He realized that for him to have such an experience, God must sovereignly arrange his environment, making it a practical cross for him to bear. This is exactly what God did. From the very beginning of his ministry, God arranged situations in which he could deny his self by bearing the cross and living by Christ as life.

Throughout the years he was a person under the cross, willing to be opposed, rejected, criticized, and condemned. He would not vindicate himself, excuse himself, reason with people, or explain things in order to reduce his sufferings. He always shunned disclosing things about himself which would let people know what good work he had done for the Lord or what good things he had done for others. He truly lived a crucified life.

In the early years of his ministry, he was excommunicated by his six co-workers. At that time his temperament and his flesh rose up to react to their action, and this inclination was reinforced by the fact that most of the saints who met with them took sides with him. While he was on a trip ministering, letters and cables were sent telling him that he had been excommunicated. At the time he received them, he was restricted from reading them. But while on a boat returning to Foochow, he read the letters and cables and was much provoked. He felt that his six co-workers had unfairly excommunicated him, and he intended to return and vindicate himself. Immediately, however, the Holy Spirit within him made him clear that the Lord would not allow him to vindicate himself, and he was silenced by the Lord. Upon his arrival many brothers and sisters were waiting for him at the pier. They simply could not help telling him how unfairly the six co-workers had dealt with him. They followed him from the pier to his home later that night, and all of their sympathy aroused his temperament, but the Lord strongly forbade him to do anything. Then, as the brothers and sisters crowded around, waiting for a definite word, he told them that the Lord would not allow him to vindicate himself and that he would leave home the next morning for another place in order to stay away from that situation. He asked them to be quiet about it, and this made them all the more disappointed. In that difficult situation he learned a great deal about how to remain in the Lord's death practically and bear the cross in order to live by Christ and for Christ. During that time of suffering, he wrote the following hymn...

We should be content to be small and should not try to be great. According to the Lord's word in Matthew 13:31-32, we should not be a great tree but a small herb that is nourishing food. The parable in these verses speaks of a mustard seed that becomes a great tree. According to Genesis 1:11-12, every plant must be according to its kind. Because mustard is a small herb, a mustard seed that becomes a tree is no longer according to its kind and thus violates the controlling principle. We naturally desire to be great, but for the church this is against God's principle. However, organized Christianity seeks to be great. If we become like that, we are through with life, we have violated God's principle, and we cannot be nourishing food to feed others like the small mustard plant. We are constantly under the temptation to be great. Especially in the United States the young people are taught to seek to be great by developing their talents and abilities. After Brother Nee was excommunicated, he wrote a hymn that says, "My heart's desire is not for fame / Nor profit in these days" Few Christian workers can say this.

Matthew 7:21-23 says, "Not everyone who says to Me, Lord, Lord, will enter into the kingdom of the heavens, but he who does the will of My Father who is in the heavens. Many will say to Me in that day, Lord, Lord, was it not in Your name that we prophesied, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name did many works of power? And then I will declare to them: I never knew you. Depart from Me, you workers of lawlessness." We need to be assured that what we have done is not lawlessness but the will of the Father.

That day in verse 22 refers to the day of the judgment seat of Christ. When Watchman Nee was excommunicated by some of the co-workers in the early years of his ministry, he wrote a hymn that says, "Unto the judgment seat of Christ / I daily look away; / May all my living and my work / Abide the fire in that day." Only the living and work that are Christ can withstand the fire. We should seriously consider whether or not the Lord will approve our living and work at His judgment seat.